We have all been there when arguing with our partner, it typically occurs at the end of the whole fiasco… Blank facial expressions, silent stares, or walking out of the room are all examples of stonewalling. The term stonewalling refers to the act of turning away from the discussion, (or person) due to a lack of mental energy or intense frustration. Stonewalling or shutting down is one of th...
Written by: Troy Law, M.A.
Often when you find that special person that you are ready to marry ‘until death do you part,’ you’ll have plenty of input from others. Many of your friends and family will be telling you what they think of your future spouse and giving you advice on what not to do in your marriage. Although advice can be good, the best advice is sound advice. One of the best sources of sound advice can come from a professionally trained therapist. Here are three good reasons to see a therapist for premarital counseling.
By going to premarital counseling, you get an objective third party professional helping you navigate the most emotional decision of your life. A therapist can help you to ask the tough questions that you may not know to ask before getting married. Many times, we don’t know or understand concepts such as distorted communication, or how to establish boundaries and realistic expectations in a relationship. A therapist will be there to guide you through these areas and much more.
A therapist can help you move from individualistic thinking, to thinking of others, thinking of your spouse, and thinking as a married couple. We all have a little bit of selfishness within us and oftentimes it can get in the way of the decision making in the marriage. A therapist can help you and your future spouse learn to be sensitive to the other’s needs while working together on the common goal of establishing a long, healthy, and fulfilling marriage.
Lastly, a therapist can also help you identify if your relationship is a good fit for marriage or help you to notice warning signs of unpreparedness that love may have you blinded to. We understand that no one is perfect, but some individuals may have to deal with their past struggles or baggage before getting married. Therapist have seen many of the common pitfalls that couples need to improve upon before getting married. They can help couples learn healthy ways to start a successful marriage and work towards a long-lasting love.